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Stop and Go

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Hi, is anyone still out there? Assuming anyone in the blogosphere is still out there and cares, I’m back with a new blog post. After establishing somewhat of a rhythm with my blog (keyword “somewhat’), I fell off the blogosphere map. I wish I could say that my absence was due to an exciting job change (nope, still at the same hell, er, I mean job), some fantastic travel opportunities (no dice there either), or a budding romance with Ryan Gosling (nope, sadly still a delusional fantasy). Here are the main not so thrilling reasons I’ve been MIA from the blog world:

1 Not enough time to draft posts: Ah yes, the universal not enough time reason for not posting in ones blog. While not an original excuse, certainly a tried and true excuse. Although a good chunk of my time has been gobbled up my job, I do realize that watching reruns of the Biggest Loser has taken up a significant portion of my time lately.

2. Stress: Considering that I still work where I do, need I say more.

3. Reverse writer’s block: It’s not that I’ve been crippled by the glare of a blinking cursor light with nothing to add behind it. On the contrary, there have been several notable items in the news that I have been wanting to write about, but my lack of confidence brought upon by some evil forces at work has kept my desire to write them at bay. Add a little dash of dread about my future and there you have the perfect mix for reverse writer’s block.

Coming to terms with the fact that you may not be able to realistically sustain yourself on what it is you love to do sucks. I am in no way saying that I won’t eventually attempt what it is I’d like to do in the future, nor am I trying to be negative. Realistically assessing where one is currently at in relation to where they’d like to be in the future provides a clear picture of not only what it will take to achieve their vision but also what achieving that vision may mean for them in the long run. All of the positive thinking and mantras in the world will not provide me with the money that I need to pay my rent, utilities, food, student loans, etc. It is precisely these things that force me to head out to a place I despise Monday through Friday. The alternative would be to be homeless and/or starving, two things I’d like to avoid. Currently, I find myself in a place where I have to start thinking about alternative things to move onto that do not suck out as much life energy as my job. What that alternative will look like, I don’t know. What I do know is that unless I win the Mega Millions or discover that I am the long, lost heir to some fortune, I’ll need to figure out a less soul sucking way to pay my bills. This being said, my time away has not been all stress and rent paying. I have been able to find solace and stress relief in two activities I never thought would provide any sort of comfort: fitness and cooking.

I used to perceive going to the gym as a chore akin to scrubbing my bathroom toilet. My lack of stamina, coordination, and of all things discomfort producing left little in me that desired going to the gym. Today, I can’t wait to hit the gym! The euphoric feelings and stress relief that I gain after each of my workouts are rivaled only by the tone and definition I am starting to see all over my body, especially my arms. While I would not categorize myself as an advanced exerciser, I hold my own and that feels great! The increased stamina, coordination, tone, and definition I am experiencing, coupled with the feelings of euphoria and stress relief make me want to push just a little bit harder each time I go to the gym. Going to the gym along with working out to some DVDs at home has made a world of difference in my life. One of the best overall workouts I have been doing is yoga. I cannot tell you how much the practice of yoga has improved my performance in all of my workout routines. I have better breath control (important during any form of exercise) and an increased awareness of how much strength my body possesses. Personally, I don’t approach yoga as a spiritual exercise, but rather, as a strength building practice that functions well beyond the realm of the yoga mat.

I had almost forgot how good it feels to write. Drafting this blog post made me feel alive. It was so refreshing to be challenged by something that I care about, something that fills me with joy. Writing strengthens me mentally, and although at times writing be stressful (enter writer’s block), it is a “good” type of stress that at the end of the day leads to a stronger version of me. While I can’t say how frequently I will be able to post in my blog, I will try my best to keep up this blog because writing is just too good to keep on the back burner.

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About musingsnyc

I'm a self-professed iOS app addict who loves reading, writing, surfing the Internet and my hometown, New York City. In 2000, I graduated from the City University of New York, Hunter College, with a degree in English (writing concentration) and Political Science. In August 2009, I received an online MBA degree with a specialization in Public Administration from the University of Phoenix. For the past 8 years, I've worked as a Paralegal in the Immigration Law Unit of one of the largest not for profit law firms in New York City. Prior to my work as a Paralegal, I worked as a Traffic Coordinator and Assistant Account Executive in a New York City based Hispanic advertising agency. Throughout all of my different work and school experiences the one constant has been my love of writing. As long as I can remember, I have been jotting words down in notebooks, pieces of scrap paper, and just about any surface where ink would not dissolve. I have always been eager to share my thoughts and opinions about what is going on in the world and my personal life via writing. It would be a dream come true if I could channel my love and passion for writing into a full-time or freelance opportunity. My goal is to share my thoughts, opinions, life experiences in a thought- provoking and entertaining way with all that drop by. I love interacting with people and thus would love and greatly appreciate all feedback via the comments section of this blog.

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